I've been having a tough time lately. Self imposed difficulties, extremely busy schedule (I guess that's self imposed too), Seasonal Affective Disorder (not my fault), way too much pain, frustrated with people, limited in my abilities, away from family and friends, man the list just keeps growing. Even when something good happens like getting involved with Hope for Bastion, I feel defeated because I can only do so much.
Guilt screams its' lies to me about my past and my frailties. Those (except my family) that I depend on leave with no excuse, The lies rattle around my head making more noise than a Dash 8 and more confusion than a 51 year old with Andropause. I got screamed at by a punk 23 year old because in his ignorance, I don't do enough from a social justice perspective. One of my last resorts, my small group, almost all come down with some illness, leaving my prepared lesson unopened.
And then my pity part ended. My beloved calls and says watch this. I dare you to watch this and feel sorry for yourself ever again. I dare you to watch this and say "I can't". I dare you to go and help someone else. Get a life and do something for someone else, I dare you!
Here's another one which allows you to hear where his joy comes from. I am amazed at the phrase, "I love living life I am happy"
I guess it's not such a bad day, week, month or life after all, is it?
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