Hazing rituals are shameful and so are the players who perform them

No, I'm not going to talk about players being taped to the goalposts, or locked naked in a bus washroom on a road trip or any other disgusting and offensive behaviour usually reserved for college age or hockey types.

No, this one comes from the world of professional sports and football to be exact. I have just finished a story about  rookie dinner where one player was required to make amends for not carrying a veterans pads, by purchasing dinner for some of the other players. Apparently, the story tells the dinner was only for the "offensive" players. Now there's a handful just in that one word alone.

The player, Dez Bryant, paid almost $55,000.00 for a dinner for some of the players. It's just grown men having a little fun right. Most people who watch these players don't make that kind of money in one year and these behemoths blow it on one dinner. What an offensive thing to do when millions are out of work, so many more are losing their homes and so many people are living on the streets.

Maybe, just maybe, if some of these guys took some time to see what it takes for the average Joe to make that kind of coin, then maybe they might just change their hazing rituals. The lowest paid player in the NFL makes more than that in a year, never mind a month, what they should do is take a look around and require the rookie to donate the money to a cause that could use it. Food for children who go to school without breakfast might be a start.

This is more than hazing. This is an affront to sensible people. Unfortunately, most people will accept it as part of the game, but these guys who play in a billion dollar playpen just don't get it.  If a small group started to boycott something like the NFL or the NHL I wonder if it would make a difference?

The real problem is that we have set these people up as idols. We pray at the flat screen altar on Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons and get our vicarious kicks all the while checking out the scantily clad cheerleaders.

It's time to wake up and do something more than try to fulfill our unmet desires on this idolatrous altar. How many of us(myself included) would be willing to walk away? I wonder?

into every life a little rain must fall

I have used this phrase many times over the years when people have commented or even dare I say, complained about the rain. I wasn't sure where it came from and some have thought that I was the originator. Unfortunately, I am not and the line actually comes from a song that the great Ella Fitzgerald and others sang. So, it's not a new phrase, but it lacks nothing because it still drips with meaning.

I usually use the phrase to respond to a negative comment. Rain is often seen by those in the comfortable west as a hindrance to every day pleasures. There are those who would die for a drop of rain, in fact they are dying because of the absence of rain. That's not why I decided to write this post, though.

Rain has wonderful qualities. It hides tears, it washes away sadness, at least on the outside. It waters the ground making it fertile. It cleanses. Too many people I speak with complain about the rain because of the temporary difficulty that it brings. The shallowness of such an approach denies the beauty of the rain and the blessings it brings.

Yes, into every life a little rain must fall, but it doesn't have to be an unwelcome thing, does it? When we were children we played in the rain much to the chagrin of our mothers. They thought we would catch a cold (how do you catch a cold anyway) and it would be "the death of us". Do you remember jumping in puddles, or riding your bike in the rain or watching the drops slowly fall from the leaves of a tree after the rain had stopped. Did you ever walk ahead of someone and grab a branch just as they walked under the tree, only to soak them?

Where is the joy of the rain? The simple effervescence of childhood bubbling over in the explosion of happiness at the sound of squeaking wellies and rainwater. Or the single drop of water causing ripples to flow seamlessly across a pond. Never returning but accomplishing their sole task of rolling across the pond. Much like the one in the photo below, thanks to Anders Gustafsson (I wonder if he is related to the Monster?)

So the next time it rains and it will, unless you live in a desert (and it rains there too sometimes), enjoy it. Embrace the pleasure of water streaming endlessly from the sky and let the drops wash away the grime of your day. Trust it to rejuvenate your spirit and remember the former times when you jumped and splashed and squealed with delight and just got soaked and loved it.

It must fall and you can choose what to do with it when it hits you...............and smile

Goodbye Lisbeth, I'll miss you (no spoilers, I think)

Wow, I finally finished the "tattoo" trilogy. At the end I didn't want it to finish. I especially liked the end and the reunion. One very interesting ploy by the author was how he "nailed" the bad guy. Oops that is a bit of a spoiler, but you'll forgive me if you get that far.

I'll miss most of the characters. It got to a point that they seemed almost real. I was told about the books early in my recovery by a colleague(thanks Leaner). He stated that he was not a reader, but he couldn't put them down. I am a reader and could and did put them down, especially when things got a little dicey for one of the "nice" characters. But, I digress, as usual. I really "liked" Lisbeth. She's not the type of person who would hang out with me and chat about books, faith, the Leafs or anything like that, but I liked her, admired some things and felt sorry for her too. It kinda weird to be honest.

I miss some of the others too, but mostly Lisbeth. As a father I wanted to make things better and I couldn't. When she was "hurt" by people, I was hurt and wanted to care for her. I repeatedly had to remind myself that she is not real. But, for a while, she was to me, real that is.

And now, like so many other people and things in my life in 2010, she has gone too. I feel abandoned and alone. Just writing it makes me sound crazy, but I am not crazy, I am deep in thought about what is real and what is not and sometimes I think the lines get blurred.

So, as the heading says, goodbye Lisbeth. You already know that I have difficulty with saying and meaning goodbye and while there may be a smidgen of control here I have to say goodbye. I have to move on to other works to meet new "friends" and even to reacquaint myself with old friends. So long and hello all at the same time.

I will miss you, I will miss cheering for you, I will miss questioning your actions and motives, but I will not miss another racing heart beat as I worry for your safety. I am so glad it was just a story.

Well, it's back to Middle Earth, time to travel with Frodo, Sam and a few others including Gollum.......... wanna come along?

Happy Birthday Bilbo and Frodo

It's Bilbo and Frodo's birthday today.

If you don't know who they are you should and if you've read this blog before you should know that I am a fan of all things about The Hobbit and The Lord of The Rings and even some obacure things about our friend JRRT.

I am a huge fan of both The Hobbit and The LOTR, but more so of the LOTR. I have an annual habit or practice or whatever to either watch or read the entire LOTR each summer. This year I decided to read it and am slowly making my way through the story. the problem is that I am also making my way through a few other works. I am trying to finish "The girl who kicked over the hornets nest" which is the third book in the Lisbeth Salander trilogy. I am also slowly working through "Into the Wild", not the jack London piece but the one about Chris McCandless.

So, here's a question for you, when reading a book that is fictional do you ever think of the characters as real and wonder how they are doing? Or is it just me? Let me know, maybe that will be the next poll question, clearly there is very little interest in the Leafs and seeing how they did last night I think I better go and cancel that parade.

have a great week y'all.........................

It's already been a month

I have a hard time believing that a month and more has passed since I lost Ruth. Many others lost her too, some who knew her for many years. But I lost someone who knew me, who loved me, who trusted me and who believed in me so much.

There is at least one others person who also does the same things and she loves me no matter what. My beloved will always believe in me, Ruth meant something different than my beloved did. Ruth was like a Mom to me and there is a special relationship between a young man and his Mom. I see it with my own son, he and his mother have a bond that is nigh unbreakable. It is amazing to watch and see the depth of the love and the honesty and fun and trust they have and they are something to behold.

I had that with Ruth and she is gone. I want to call her and tell her about my accomplishments, like walking around the block and I can't. I know some think that you can talk to the dearly departed and they hear us, I want more than that I want a response.  That's not too much to ask is it? I can ask, but I am not going to get it any time soon.

In the parts of my brain that understand hard facts, I know I will see her again, but I want to see her now. I want to talk to her and hear her advice and wise comments and even a few wise cracks. Oh she could laugh and love but she couldn't last. That damn cancer took her and yes I understand it was God's timing, but just once I wanted it to be on my terms. So many kind acting people have said things like "we only see one part of the canvas", or "we only see just a few pixels of the whole picture" and I understand all that, it just doesn't help to alleviate the hurt.

Their well meaning platitudes don't help anymore.

How do I miss her? let me count the ways.................

We did it!

We (my beloved, myself and trusty old "walker") finally accomplished goal number 1 (so numbered as it was the most important to me so far) of my post surgery days. We completed the first odyssey of our little block. The entire block is about 1.5 kms, not much in reality but when walking less than 50 meters was a problem before, this is a major accomplishment. We completed it this afternoon. It should have happened earlier, but a number of things including a little parasite got in the way. That was no fun. Now it is done, time to wipe that little one off the list, or maybe start a new list.

Well, this is just the start of a number of such odysseys. It is our plan to do this journey daily and then eventually to extend it beyond our local borders. It felt great to accomplish. I experienced no complications, no numbness, no pain, nothing!  I am ecstatic. This was my primary goal to accomplish following this surgery. I advised the surgeon that this was what I wanted out of all this.

Now on to greater things. I can't wait to walk on Caribbean beaches or paths previously unknown to me. Maybe I'll get a bike and start pedalling my way around town and then beyond? Maybe this will lead me to my own "alaska" whatever that may be.

Who knows what might be next, I do not, but I do know this, I made it and I am happy.................

It's been a month already

I can't really believe it.

A month has gone by since she passed and I miss her still and so much.

Death is a thief, it comes at the most inopportune time and steals our loved ones from us. It rips them from our hands and draws them from the warmth of our lives.

And yet, we who believe that death is not final know this, the victory of death is short lived and the sting of death will pass. We know that she is living an eternal life with the one she loved more than us. We know that all she really wanted was to see Jesus and be welcomed home. We know that she was received with these words: "well done good and faithful servant into into the joy of your rest". And rest she will, when she is not loving and worshipping the one who formed her in her mothers womb. The one who lovingly sought after her when she needed to really know Him.

A month has gone in our time measurement. We will see you again soon but I still miss you terribly.........

The polls have arrived

I have added a poll to the blog. That's the little thing to your right.

Looking at trying to gauge the readership, although I know that there are readers from all over the world, pretty cool eh? I have the ability to see where the readers are and from what countries they are from.

So, if you have ideas for the poll, feel free to drop me a line and suggest, no guarantees though and keep it clean.

The content will change each two weeks and will be all over the map music, books, "alaska", faith, the Leafs, sports and who knows what else.

Have fun!

Back to work and other change.................

Well I have completed four shifts so far this week. I am back at work attempting to condition myself to the daily rigours of work life. It's been a little tough at times and I have only just begun (eew the Carpenters). That's a completely different story isn't it? I place them in the same context as ABBA.

Oh well, work is helping with the recovery process. I plan on achieving full throttle by the week of September 27/10 and then will have a few weeks before the next change happens.

I applied for a new position with this organization (where I have worked for 24 1/2 years) during the summer. I gave it some serious thought and prayer and since I have not applied for a job in some time (1993), I did a lot of research on the process and the new position. It has been an interesting journey. For a portion of the preparatory time, I considered just withdrawing from the competition. I was focused on caring for my friend who was battling cancer and wondered aloud if I should just forget about it. Thanks to my beloved and a few other close people I decided to stay in the competition and completed a "work sample" and an interview and finally got an answer yesterday. I got it!

So, more changes are ahead. Change is not a bad thing, how we handle change is one depiction of who we are or say we are. This should be fun and challenging. It will require my having to be certified(keep the jokes to yourselves) by a federal agency to demonstrate the professionalism of the group of people doing the job.

I go into it with some hesitation. Is this the place for me? Is this going to lead me anywhere but just a job? Will there be opportunities to broaden my horizons? What will be there for me besides a place to do work and earn a pay cheque? I want more out of life, don't you? There's got to be more than the daily grind and I don't mean the coffee.

I've determined that life and the jobs I do are so much more than a comfortable chair to warm my bum. This change might bring me closer to my "Alaska" and for an explanation see my posts on "into the wild". If it doesn't then what? When I experience change either by imposition or by choice I must use the opportunity to assess and reflect the affect of the change on me, my family and my surroundings. If it just happens, then there is no learning. The apathy of "why bother" creeps into my consciousness but there has to be a reason.

What was the reason and what are the learning's from 2008? With the outrageous damage inflicted upon so many of us by one man's bad behaviour, we must learn and grow. We have to hold onto what is dear and love and forgive. If we do not we learn nothing from the last 2 1/4 years. Words that were spoken in angst sounded nice but were truly evil. Taking the high road has to be for all, not just one. Change is happening, it's not easy, it's tough. Forgiveness is not easy, but it is required to help make the changes be significant and relevant. Maybe to forgive is to be open to change, to reflect and to see the better part of someone.

So, what's it going to be?

What is your Alaska?

Chris McCandless of "Into the Wild" infamy planned and executed his great Alaska odyssey. This was his dream and it stuck with him and unfortunately killed him too. He has been lauded as a hero and as a reckless person who was unwise at best.

I'll let each of you draw your own conclusions. I am presently reading Krakauer's book about Chris and will make my own determination when I finish the book and any other material I can get my hands on.

Here's my thought. Do you have an "Alaska" that's sitting there in the recesses of your mind? Do I have one? Is there something waiting to be fulfilled? What is it that drives you crazy thinking? Is there a destination, a place, a person or just some life long hidden goal that you would love to achieve?

I wonder if behind the cage of society lie dreams that have been dormant for many years. What will it take for you or I to rise against this sense of society and push beyond these man made borders and work to achieve your personal Alaska, or mine? I wonder what it would be like to push away from the stall and just walk. To become lost on purpose in order to find what I am looking for, I'm sure there's a U2 reference there somehow.

I would do it, but not like Chris. I would be released from society but not totally absent from it. I would contact family and friends, somehow. They deserve to know...........a little. I wonder what it would be like, don't you? Is everyone so afraid that there is no dreaming left? The road does go on and on and where it leads I do not know, but I want to know......................... and soon.

Of book burning, mosques, 911 and other stuff..........

What is it with people these days anyway?

Maybe, just maybe, Rodney King had it right when he said "why can't we all just get along?".

It's probably because of one thing, selfishness. The burning of someone else's holy book no matter what you think of it and its' contents is just plain wrong. There is nothing good that can come from this behaviour. But, to blame it as an excuse for other behaviour is just idiotic and irrational. That's tantamount to saying "you made me (add your own action here)". No one can make you do anything you choose not to do. So, now thousands in places afar and to most unknown are protesting and burning flags and who knows what else, and not just American flag by the way. I wonder why? This just gives the haters another stage and who is to blame for that? For the so called leader of the free world to get into this "discussion" is also idiotic. The press blew the story about the 50 member church in Florida into the flames that it has become (no pun intended). This is so much more than the 15 minutes that they deserved, if in fact they deserved any. The time to stop reporting this on national news is now. It's time to stop reporting on this selfish man and his flock. Take away the platform.

And another thing is this mosque or centre that they are planning to build. The plan is to name it Cordoba, and not after the car by the way. They hold Cordoba as a bastion of inter religious equality, but a good read of history tells a different tale. The place was taken by force from Christians many years ago. Read the truth and see what it really means. So, why would a "peace loving" group want to put an Islamic Centre near the place of almost 3000 murders? Why is there a church still awaiting permission from the City of New York to repair their building damaged on 911 when this "centre" has been given permission to go ahead? Mr. Trump is offering to purchase the land at a 25% premium in cash so that they would not build their centre there and what has been the answer? They purchased the property for 4.8 million less than a year ago and Trump offered them 6 million. They said no because the property is worth more than 20 million. In an article in "The Atlantic" Trump refers to this as "extortion". Hmm, selfishness, you bet! Just watch carefully and see what they do with this one.

This weekend, tomorrow to be exact is the 9th anniversary of the murders of September 11, 1991. Some people are looking at the beginning of the Jewish High Holy days, the end of ramadan and the anniversary of 911 as some type religious confluence or convergence of great import. This is being used to talk about tolerance, a wonderful word that currently seems to mean "don't disagree with me or I'll add phobe to the end of whoever I am and apply it to you". What I believe is really happening is the opportunity to trick people into accepting what they do not wish to accept under the guise of tolerance and political correctness . Once again, selfishness but to what aim? What's next a one world religion?

Why can't we just get along? Because in a life without peace, forgiveness and some semblance of a "golden rule" there will always be selfishness. How can we change the course of humanity? Try a little tenderness, (I just had to have a musical reference). But seriously folks, when was the last time you worked for peace? When was the last time you forgave someone? When was the last time you did to someone as you wish they would have done to you? Life isn't about burning books, or imposing oneself on others, or extortion but rather on living a life beyond the mirror of self and one of serving others.

Some thoughts as the summer draws to an end and the fall begins and winter awaits.........................

Into the Wild part 4, some possible spoilers

I've been wondering about some things lately.

One, of course, is related to Chris McCandless's drive to accomplish a goal that he set for himself. He wanted to live a life without a safety net (my words not his) and he also set a goal of living off the land in Alaska. He made it to Alaska and survived for 113 days. So many have said that life is not in the destination, but rather in the journey and it seems that his journey although fraught with difficulty and eventual failure still stands out.

I wonder how many of us have had dreams like Chris and have never been able to fulfill them. How many dreams are dying the slow death of fear and abandonment in the recesses of our minds? It appears that some thoughts that I have considered over the last months are coming together, those being the catatonic fear that immobilizes us and the failure to dream or worse the inability to consummate the dream.

Fear didn't stop Chris because based on what I have read, he was a dreamer (just listen to Supertramp) and he consummated his dreams, unfortunately not to the conclusion that he expected, but he did get there.

What would life be like if you (and I) were not so afraid? What is stopping us from living the life that we might have, if we allowed ourselves to dream? How much would change?

I do not suggest throwing caution to the wind or anywhere else. Most of us cannot just give up life and walk away. That would be irresponsible. To walk away from family and loved ones to accomplish my dreams would be selfish. If Chris demonstrated anything by not staying in contact with his family, he demonstrated that "happiness only real when shared" and if we abandon loved ones to accomplish our dreams then we have not learned anything.

So, what's it gonna be...............................?



 

more changes to the blog

I hope that you like the changes.

I wanted the background to reflect the title, so as you can see the path is clear, somewhat.

I have enabled comments, again. Let's hope that the tools in place will help me keep the spam out.

Look for more "into the wild' ramblings from me as this kid has found a deep place in my mind.

Into the Wild part 3

Yes it is still hanging on in my brain, partly because it won't leave and partly because I am still trying to figure it out. Now part of the issue is determining what "it" is. Partly because I have downloaded (legally) the album soundtrack of amazing music by Eddie Vedder, haunting especially how he wrote lyrics to match the story so well. I have been "stuck" thinking about Chris McCandless for several days now after watching the film "Into the Wild" on Sept.6/10.

One thing that strikes me about him was his lack of fear. From what I have read and watched over the last two days, there is nothing that showed he was afraid. he disliked things strongly, but I have not gotten the sense that he was afraid. Maybe that's it!

A life lived without fear, at least until the end maybe, but a life without fear, wow!

But at the end one would expect to have no more fear, but the SOS message seemed to show that he was fearful of his ability to survive.

What would a life without fear be like?

I wonder but maybe too afraid to experience a life like that, I wonder..................

Into the Wild part 2

I can't seem to get this kid (he wasn't really a kid) out of my mind.

I am not sure why, but so many questions are stuck in my mind about him. So much other stuff in my head has had the fuse lit by this story about a dreamer, minimalist, adventurer and misguided young man.

Something about the story doesn't fit for me and I can't seem to figure out which part, or parts. He was intelligent, smart, moral (define that these days) and athletic. It just doesn't appear that he had common sense. I read the 9000 word piece by Krakauer in "Outsider" magazine and intend to read the book by the same author to see what I can discover about this lost dreamer aka Alexander Supertramp, who too late discovered to call things (including himself) by their right name.

I can't figure it out..............

Into the Wild ........ some spoilers........some thoughts

Had some alone time today.

Saw a film on tv that looked interesting and was mesmerized by the entire thing. The film is "Into the Wild". Sean Penn is an amazing director and Eddie Vedder added such depth to the visuals with his music.

The movie is an adaptation of a book by Jon Krakauer which describes the tale of Christopher McCandless and his journey to Alaska and the adventure that he anticipated. I guess this will have to go on the list of books to read now.

He left family and career and money and well everything behind to achieve his journey. What he realized came too late in an entry in one of his books where he wrote "happiness only real when shared". How sad, this broken young man wanting to get away from it all and realizing that he could not have happiness without sharing it with someone.

I was deeply moved by the film and the story. I am also reminded that the journey is not meant to be alone. It's ok to have alone time, such as today, but this is not the way it was meant to be. Chris figured it out just a little too late. A small stream turned into a rushing torrent and that was his undoing. He could see the redemption on the other side and he couldn't get to it.

I wonder if there is an undoing for me. Or is there a lesson. I believe that there's always a lesson, I can't go it alone, can you? We need others, friends, family, lovers even strangers and we need to let them in. Tear down the walls and break the doors and open up.

Been thinkin' about some things..............

Been thinking about the suffix "phobe" lately,

why is it that when someone, who apparently lives within an environment that poses to have free speech, says something about a person or group, is automatically handed the suffix "phobia"? Just because I disagree with the "ground zero mosque" does not make me an islamaphobe.

Just because I disagree with certain behaviours that are chosen by a group, does not make me homophobe or any other type of phobe, if such a word exists yet. Maybe now I have offended the librarians.

What's next, will I be called a "hawkingphobe" because I disagree with the man's position about God?

When did it become mandatory that we all have to agree on something never mind anything? In a society that seems dead set on allowing individuality, it is at the same time dead set against being told that anything is "wrong".

Been thinking about loss lately? I lost a close friend recently, I lost a great source of wisdom, a trusted confidante and beloved family member to the dreaded "c" cancer. It took her from me in so many ways. In the taking, it left me with incredible loss. There is a hole where the discussions should be and it is cavernous, bigger and deeper than the grand canyon or the mariana trench(the rift not the group). Few people have made the imprint on me like this loved one has.

Been thinking about how the actions of one person can have a cumulative affect on so many people. Little did he know when he took his biggest and most selfish action what kind of affect this would have on so many other people.

Kinda makes you want to go hmmmm doesn't it?

The next time I choose to do anything (even pressing "publish post" on this page) I just might have to think about who this might affect down the road. It's not like I am killing someone is it?

At least thinking about doesn't affect anyone, or does it? It still affects me and my thoughts are powerful, to paraphrase a great thinker, "if you have thought it in your mind then you have already acted it out".

Better think better, I think