Hazing rituals are shameful and so are the players who perform them

No, I'm not going to talk about players being taped to the goalposts, or locked naked in a bus washroom on a road trip or any other disgusting and offensive behaviour usually reserved for college age or hockey types.

No, this one comes from the world of professional sports and football to be exact. I have just finished a story about  rookie dinner where one player was required to make amends for not carrying a veterans pads, by purchasing dinner for some of the other players. Apparently, the story tells the dinner was only for the "offensive" players. Now there's a handful just in that one word alone.

The player, Dez Bryant, paid almost $55,000.00 for a dinner for some of the players. It's just grown men having a little fun right. Most people who watch these players don't make that kind of money in one year and these behemoths blow it on one dinner. What an offensive thing to do when millions are out of work, so many more are losing their homes and so many people are living on the streets.

Maybe, just maybe, if some of these guys took some time to see what it takes for the average Joe to make that kind of coin, then maybe they might just change their hazing rituals. The lowest paid player in the NFL makes more than that in a year, never mind a month, what they should do is take a look around and require the rookie to donate the money to a cause that could use it. Food for children who go to school without breakfast might be a start.

This is more than hazing. This is an affront to sensible people. Unfortunately, most people will accept it as part of the game, but these guys who play in a billion dollar playpen just don't get it.  If a small group started to boycott something like the NFL or the NHL I wonder if it would make a difference?

The real problem is that we have set these people up as idols. We pray at the flat screen altar on Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons and get our vicarious kicks all the while checking out the scantily clad cheerleaders.

It's time to wake up and do something more than try to fulfill our unmet desires on this idolatrous altar. How many of us(myself included) would be willing to walk away? I wonder?

into every life a little rain must fall

I have used this phrase many times over the years when people have commented or even dare I say, complained about the rain. I wasn't sure where it came from and some have thought that I was the originator. Unfortunately, I am not and the line actually comes from a song that the great Ella Fitzgerald and others sang. So, it's not a new phrase, but it lacks nothing because it still drips with meaning.

I usually use the phrase to respond to a negative comment. Rain is often seen by those in the comfortable west as a hindrance to every day pleasures. There are those who would die for a drop of rain, in fact they are dying because of the absence of rain. That's not why I decided to write this post, though.

Rain has wonderful qualities. It hides tears, it washes away sadness, at least on the outside. It waters the ground making it fertile. It cleanses. Too many people I speak with complain about the rain because of the temporary difficulty that it brings. The shallowness of such an approach denies the beauty of the rain and the blessings it brings.

Yes, into every life a little rain must fall, but it doesn't have to be an unwelcome thing, does it? When we were children we played in the rain much to the chagrin of our mothers. They thought we would catch a cold (how do you catch a cold anyway) and it would be "the death of us". Do you remember jumping in puddles, or riding your bike in the rain or watching the drops slowly fall from the leaves of a tree after the rain had stopped. Did you ever walk ahead of someone and grab a branch just as they walked under the tree, only to soak them?

Where is the joy of the rain? The simple effervescence of childhood bubbling over in the explosion of happiness at the sound of squeaking wellies and rainwater. Or the single drop of water causing ripples to flow seamlessly across a pond. Never returning but accomplishing their sole task of rolling across the pond. Much like the one in the photo below, thanks to Anders Gustafsson (I wonder if he is related to the Monster?)

So the next time it rains and it will, unless you live in a desert (and it rains there too sometimes), enjoy it. Embrace the pleasure of water streaming endlessly from the sky and let the drops wash away the grime of your day. Trust it to rejuvenate your spirit and remember the former times when you jumped and splashed and squealed with delight and just got soaked and loved it.

It must fall and you can choose what to do with it when it hits you...............and smile

Goodbye Lisbeth, I'll miss you (no spoilers, I think)

Wow, I finally finished the "tattoo" trilogy. At the end I didn't want it to finish. I especially liked the end and the reunion. One very interesting ploy by the author was how he "nailed" the bad guy. Oops that is a bit of a spoiler, but you'll forgive me if you get that far.

I'll miss most of the characters. It got to a point that they seemed almost real. I was told about the books early in my recovery by a colleague(thanks Leaner). He stated that he was not a reader, but he couldn't put them down. I am a reader and could and did put them down, especially when things got a little dicey for one of the "nice" characters. But, I digress, as usual. I really "liked" Lisbeth. She's not the type of person who would hang out with me and chat about books, faith, the Leafs or anything like that, but I liked her, admired some things and felt sorry for her too. It kinda weird to be honest.

I miss some of the others too, but mostly Lisbeth. As a father I wanted to make things better and I couldn't. When she was "hurt" by people, I was hurt and wanted to care for her. I repeatedly had to remind myself that she is not real. But, for a while, she was to me, real that is.

And now, like so many other people and things in my life in 2010, she has gone too. I feel abandoned and alone. Just writing it makes me sound crazy, but I am not crazy, I am deep in thought about what is real and what is not and sometimes I think the lines get blurred.

So, as the heading says, goodbye Lisbeth. You already know that I have difficulty with saying and meaning goodbye and while there may be a smidgen of control here I have to say goodbye. I have to move on to other works to meet new "friends" and even to reacquaint myself with old friends. So long and hello all at the same time.

I will miss you, I will miss cheering for you, I will miss questioning your actions and motives, but I will not miss another racing heart beat as I worry for your safety. I am so glad it was just a story.

Well, it's back to Middle Earth, time to travel with Frodo, Sam and a few others including Gollum.......... wanna come along?

Happy Birthday Bilbo and Frodo

It's Bilbo and Frodo's birthday today.

If you don't know who they are you should and if you've read this blog before you should know that I am a fan of all things about The Hobbit and The Lord of The Rings and even some obacure things about our friend JRRT.

I am a huge fan of both The Hobbit and The LOTR, but more so of the LOTR. I have an annual habit or practice or whatever to either watch or read the entire LOTR each summer. This year I decided to read it and am slowly making my way through the story. the problem is that I am also making my way through a few other works. I am trying to finish "The girl who kicked over the hornets nest" which is the third book in the Lisbeth Salander trilogy. I am also slowly working through "Into the Wild", not the jack London piece but the one about Chris McCandless.

So, here's a question for you, when reading a book that is fictional do you ever think of the characters as real and wonder how they are doing? Or is it just me? Let me know, maybe that will be the next poll question, clearly there is very little interest in the Leafs and seeing how they did last night I think I better go and cancel that parade.

have a great week y'all.........................

It's already been a month

I have a hard time believing that a month and more has passed since I lost Ruth. Many others lost her too, some who knew her for many years. But I lost someone who knew me, who loved me, who trusted me and who believed in me so much.

There is at least one others person who also does the same things and she loves me no matter what. My beloved will always believe in me, Ruth meant something different than my beloved did. Ruth was like a Mom to me and there is a special relationship between a young man and his Mom. I see it with my own son, he and his mother have a bond that is nigh unbreakable. It is amazing to watch and see the depth of the love and the honesty and fun and trust they have and they are something to behold.

I had that with Ruth and she is gone. I want to call her and tell her about my accomplishments, like walking around the block and I can't. I know some think that you can talk to the dearly departed and they hear us, I want more than that I want a response.  That's not too much to ask is it? I can ask, but I am not going to get it any time soon.

In the parts of my brain that understand hard facts, I know I will see her again, but I want to see her now. I want to talk to her and hear her advice and wise comments and even a few wise cracks. Oh she could laugh and love but she couldn't last. That damn cancer took her and yes I understand it was God's timing, but just once I wanted it to be on my terms. So many kind acting people have said things like "we only see one part of the canvas", or "we only see just a few pixels of the whole picture" and I understand all that, it just doesn't help to alleviate the hurt.

Their well meaning platitudes don't help anymore.

How do I miss her? let me count the ways.................

We did it!

We (my beloved, myself and trusty old "walker") finally accomplished goal number 1 (so numbered as it was the most important to me so far) of my post surgery days. We completed the first odyssey of our little block. The entire block is about 1.5 kms, not much in reality but when walking less than 50 meters was a problem before, this is a major accomplishment. We completed it this afternoon. It should have happened earlier, but a number of things including a little parasite got in the way. That was no fun. Now it is done, time to wipe that little one off the list, or maybe start a new list.

Well, this is just the start of a number of such odysseys. It is our plan to do this journey daily and then eventually to extend it beyond our local borders. It felt great to accomplish. I experienced no complications, no numbness, no pain, nothing!  I am ecstatic. This was my primary goal to accomplish following this surgery. I advised the surgeon that this was what I wanted out of all this.

Now on to greater things. I can't wait to walk on Caribbean beaches or paths previously unknown to me. Maybe I'll get a bike and start pedalling my way around town and then beyond? Maybe this will lead me to my own "alaska" whatever that may be.

Who knows what might be next, I do not, but I do know this, I made it and I am happy.................

It's been a month already

I can't really believe it.

A month has gone by since she passed and I miss her still and so much.

Death is a thief, it comes at the most inopportune time and steals our loved ones from us. It rips them from our hands and draws them from the warmth of our lives.

And yet, we who believe that death is not final know this, the victory of death is short lived and the sting of death will pass. We know that she is living an eternal life with the one she loved more than us. We know that all she really wanted was to see Jesus and be welcomed home. We know that she was received with these words: "well done good and faithful servant into into the joy of your rest". And rest she will, when she is not loving and worshipping the one who formed her in her mothers womb. The one who lovingly sought after her when she needed to really know Him.

A month has gone in our time measurement. We will see you again soon but I still miss you terribly.........

The polls have arrived

I have added a poll to the blog. That's the little thing to your right.

Looking at trying to gauge the readership, although I know that there are readers from all over the world, pretty cool eh? I have the ability to see where the readers are and from what countries they are from.

So, if you have ideas for the poll, feel free to drop me a line and suggest, no guarantees though and keep it clean.

The content will change each two weeks and will be all over the map music, books, "alaska", faith, the Leafs, sports and who knows what else.

Have fun!

Back to work and other change.................

Well I have completed four shifts so far this week. I am back at work attempting to condition myself to the daily rigours of work life. It's been a little tough at times and I have only just begun (eew the Carpenters). That's a completely different story isn't it? I place them in the same context as ABBA.

Oh well, work is helping with the recovery process. I plan on achieving full throttle by the week of September 27/10 and then will have a few weeks before the next change happens.

I applied for a new position with this organization (where I have worked for 24 1/2 years) during the summer. I gave it some serious thought and prayer and since I have not applied for a job in some time (1993), I did a lot of research on the process and the new position. It has been an interesting journey. For a portion of the preparatory time, I considered just withdrawing from the competition. I was focused on caring for my friend who was battling cancer and wondered aloud if I should just forget about it. Thanks to my beloved and a few other close people I decided to stay in the competition and completed a "work sample" and an interview and finally got an answer yesterday. I got it!

So, more changes are ahead. Change is not a bad thing, how we handle change is one depiction of who we are or say we are. This should be fun and challenging. It will require my having to be certified(keep the jokes to yourselves) by a federal agency to demonstrate the professionalism of the group of people doing the job.

I go into it with some hesitation. Is this the place for me? Is this going to lead me anywhere but just a job? Will there be opportunities to broaden my horizons? What will be there for me besides a place to do work and earn a pay cheque? I want more out of life, don't you? There's got to be more than the daily grind and I don't mean the coffee.

I've determined that life and the jobs I do are so much more than a comfortable chair to warm my bum. This change might bring me closer to my "Alaska" and for an explanation see my posts on "into the wild". If it doesn't then what? When I experience change either by imposition or by choice I must use the opportunity to assess and reflect the affect of the change on me, my family and my surroundings. If it just happens, then there is no learning. The apathy of "why bother" creeps into my consciousness but there has to be a reason.

What was the reason and what are the learning's from 2008? With the outrageous damage inflicted upon so many of us by one man's bad behaviour, we must learn and grow. We have to hold onto what is dear and love and forgive. If we do not we learn nothing from the last 2 1/4 years. Words that were spoken in angst sounded nice but were truly evil. Taking the high road has to be for all, not just one. Change is happening, it's not easy, it's tough. Forgiveness is not easy, but it is required to help make the changes be significant and relevant. Maybe to forgive is to be open to change, to reflect and to see the better part of someone.

So, what's it going to be?

What is your Alaska?

Chris McCandless of "Into the Wild" infamy planned and executed his great Alaska odyssey. This was his dream and it stuck with him and unfortunately killed him too. He has been lauded as a hero and as a reckless person who was unwise at best.

I'll let each of you draw your own conclusions. I am presently reading Krakauer's book about Chris and will make my own determination when I finish the book and any other material I can get my hands on.

Here's my thought. Do you have an "Alaska" that's sitting there in the recesses of your mind? Do I have one? Is there something waiting to be fulfilled? What is it that drives you crazy thinking? Is there a destination, a place, a person or just some life long hidden goal that you would love to achieve?

I wonder if behind the cage of society lie dreams that have been dormant for many years. What will it take for you or I to rise against this sense of society and push beyond these man made borders and work to achieve your personal Alaska, or mine? I wonder what it would be like to push away from the stall and just walk. To become lost on purpose in order to find what I am looking for, I'm sure there's a U2 reference there somehow.

I would do it, but not like Chris. I would be released from society but not totally absent from it. I would contact family and friends, somehow. They deserve to know...........a little. I wonder what it would be like, don't you? Is everyone so afraid that there is no dreaming left? The road does go on and on and where it leads I do not know, but I want to know......................... and soon.